Dear NoLongerMyHusband,
According to
provincial law, from the very second you left this house with the
intention of no longer living like partners, our marriage ended.
This means that I am no longer your wife.
I have a signed and witnessed Separation agreement. You signed it! You had your BOSS witness it.
This means I am no longer your wife.
So
why is it that I still have to care for your cat? A cat I am allergic
to, that was only welcomed here as an extension of your welcome here?
You say you 'can't look after her' but that still does not explain WHY
this is my problem?
Why is it that when you are broke you call me?
Why is that MY problem? I supported you through your wait for a job
permit, and when you left you took our family income! I have the cat,
the kids and full time school and no hours in which to work, but YOu
think I should give YOU money?
Why is it that you call me asking
me how to 1. pay your bills, 2. fill out your empolyment paperwork 3.
how to pay childsupport 4. How to get an apartment 5. how to get your
credit card 6. how to sell your truck.... The list is endless. These
things are no longer my responsibility. YOU are no longer my
responsibility. YOU FUCKING chose this, why am I supposed to still look
after you? Are you looking after me in ANY FUCKING WAY? Do I call you
asking for you to take out the trash? Fix my car? shovel the driveway?
fix the plumbing? (oh.. never mind.. I did all those tings anyways. )
Why
is it that you call me looking for hugs? You are lonely? um.. you had a
family and didn't want them. You had a pile of people extend
friendship to you and you hid in the living room instead of accepting
any overtures.. Why is it my problem that you are lonely? You are
scared? Who made the choices that are now weighing on you?
The
kids don't call you? Really? So you are saying, that after you left
(without a fucking word to them about it) and did not contact them for
nearly TWO FUCKING WEEKS, they should be gleefully chasing your pouty,
bitter, self pitying self for conversations? After nearly a decade of
you withrdrawing from them, suddenly because you NEED them they should
want to call you?? Really?
Life is rough for you? Money is tight? You have no one? No one wants to hang out with you?
Fuck..
I
told you and told you, begged and pleaded with you, yelled and cried...
I tried dammit. I tried to get you to GRAB the life you have and LIVE
it! This is the only life you get, and you are wasting it.
You
are so busy blaming everyone (its your ex, your sister, your mother,
your father, your grandparents, your work, your boss, that coworker, me,
teh kids, david, jarrett, my family, the neighbours, my friends... )
everyone but you. What is teh common denominator?
How come, if
our marriage is my fault (oh, Angel changed so much.. she stopped loving
you? really?) then how come leaving didn't make your live better? It
made mine better. It made the kids's life better.
How come your
walking away from everyone in the states didn't fix your life? How come
the people you blame are still doing fine, but you are not?
IT IS
YOU!! You won't let go of the imagined and real hurts of the past. Yes
it hurts. Fuck we ALL hurt. Get OVER IT. You won't enjoy any damn
thing that comes your way. You insist on drama, you refuse
peacefullness. You sat on that couch and would NOT live with us.
AND
you fucking pretend that you oh so did not cross the line with Cindy?
Really? When was the last time you took your family to something like
the ice show? Do I sit and text under a blanket to a guy? WTF?
You
wouldn't cuddle. You wouldn't laugh with us. You would not tolerate
us. You would not take joy with us. So now you chose to leave, and you
want me to make your leaving better for you... Well fUCK THAT.
Quit fucking asking me for help. Quit calling my uber broke ass for money. Quit blaming everyone else for your loneliness.
You
make more money to support your single ass than I do to pay the TWO
FUCKING mortgatges you left me with and support a family of four, one of
those is YOUR CAT.
You won't pay childsupport, you wont take
responsibility for your choices and you won't do a damn thing but mope
about. Enjoy it I guess. But know that, regardless of how far you run,
how many people you walk away from, you can't leave yourself. Even if
you DO suicide like you hinted, you will still be with you right to the
bitter end. So if you are not happy, fucking do something about it.
(something that does not involve me)
Do you know what is really funny?
You
will likely not ever find anyone that will love you without reserve the
way I did. I trusted you, believed in you, loved you. I opened my
home to you, shared everything I have with you. And you tried to break
it. But after watching me walk away from a 15 year relationship, away
from the man I had my children with, and STILL SURVIVE IT what made you
think you could destroy what makes me who I am?
I am a creature of
positive energy, of laughter, dancing in teh kitchen, singing off key
and rainbows. I am a creature of sunlight, sexual energy, forgiveness
and awareness.But more than that, I know myself. I am aware of my self
and I respect myself. You can't take that away.
Most Sincerely,
the woman who is NOT your fucking wife.
