Some men.... Just suck

Some men just suck.
Trust me sweetheart... I am nothing like him... (I am exactly like him, but in some small ways improved, in other small ways much worse).  You are my princess, I cherish you (until you are bound to me, trapped by dependancy), I love your open sexuality, you are so hot (but I will stop loving it, as soon as you come to crave the daily contact), I love how intelligent you are, of course I am not threatened by it (but I will make you suffer for every moment I feel you have bested me, surpassed me or ventured into anything that doesn't include me) I will be strong for you, it is okay to lean on me (and when you do I will mock you then not be there for you).  Let me hold you, be your comfort, it is okay to cry (and then, upon sight of even one tear, I will walk away, disgusted.)
And my favorite.  "I love you."
I don't know what that means to some people, but I for one can't just stop loving someone just because it is difficult.
I hate that I don't get to just turn off how I feel the way certain jackasses seem to be able to do.  I hate that by caring I loose some of my coveted control over my life, that regardless of my lack of enjoyment for tears, pouts, rants, anger, irritation and all that fun break up upheaval I get to experience it all.
Yeah yeah, it will get better.  Yes, I am doing ok, I am moving foward day by day.  But It still irks me.  Why should he get to make all these damned choices, all along, that hurt me and mine? WHY? And worse I think is the guilt... Because I don't really miss him.  The house is so damn peaceful.  So home.  I mean... I hurt but... I am relieved too.  Grateful.  Relaxed.  But guilty...
Why should I be sitting here feeling guilty that I am taking this trip.  I EARNED this trip.  I DESERVE it dammit.. I deserve it far more than he deserves to be able to just bail on us financially and then demand food money from me.  And so what if the card is a bit racked up after.  So what??
I am the one who has to pay it off. My playtime, my bill, my responsibility...
BAH. 
Some men... Just Suck...