When Good Girls are Bad

What happens when a good girl is bad?

I have my days.  Sometimes the weight of my responsibilities and my coping strategies do NOT align and I fall a little. There are days I am not sure if I can keep going.  I am human.  I mess up.

Sometimes, even while still being a GOOD GIRL, things go wrong.  I make a mistake, I loose my cool, I hurt someone, I let someone down.

As I am a compassionate person, I feel horrible when that happens.  Which is why I like to argue that I am NEVER a bad girl.

When good girls are bad, it hurts our feelings.  We carry our wrong-doing close to our heart.  We hold on to it, examining, trying to make sense of it.  We need to understand it, so that we can learn from it.
There is no punishment that someone could give me that would make me feel worse than I instinctively do when I have fallen, failed or caused someone else to hurt.

When good girls are bad, they punish themselves, emotionally and mentally.

Why? Because they are gooood girls. 

There are times when I am not being a good girl, but I THINK I am.  It may not be a good idea to try to punish me for that either, as if I oh so do not think I have done anything wrong, I will not 'accept' your damned punishment.

However, if you are on my list of trusted persons, or even share your point of view in an adult manner, I will likely hear you.  I may not process it in that moment.  I may not agree right away.  But I try to be on it.  I do!

~.o